A reader writes:
I wrote a letter of apology to someone against whom I have harbored resentment for many, many years. This person, my father, has been dead since I was a young woman.
At first it was ludicrous — me apologizing to him?!? It should be the other way around! But I did it, I apologized to him for harboring resentment towards him. Jett, it was like magic. It freed me! All this time I’d thought that his evil deeds against me had damaged me and crippled me forever, that I would never get out from under what he did. Working on that letter (and it took several drafts) I realized that while his evil deeds may have damaged me initially, it was my resentment that kept me crippled. Wow, what an insight! My resentment kept me tied to him! What a revelation! I looked at it every which way, and I had to admit it was true. I had crippled myself with my resentment.
Then I had to write a letter of apology to myself! I had to acknowledge that I had kept myself crippled, even as I blamed him. I apologized to myself for crippling myself with resentment. Then I wrote another letter to my father, apologizing for blaming him for something that I had done to myself.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t all of sudden think that my father was a saint. He was an evil man. But I can let that go now. At 55, I can finally let that go and be free. That was then and this is now. And now I am free. I can’t tell you how good it feels!! Magic letters of apology!!! Thank you for this wonderful teaching!
I am in Duluth. Actually, I’m about 10 miles north of Duluth on Hwy. 53. I expect to be here all summer. If you want a reading in person, let me know. I suggest that you schedule your reading sooner rather than later — even though I expect to be here all summer, I’m here because of my spouse’s job, which always means that things can change at a moment’s notice. Call me or email me to schedule your reading.